humor me?

So....

I've been perusing various blogs lately. Reading....laughing...oohing...aahing. Taking note of all the creativity that comes with humour...sarcasm...wit...art. There are a lot of truly talented typers in the world wide blogosphere. Where do they find the time?

Then....there's me....or....mine.

Pretty damn dry. Boring. Blah...

Basic black background. Simple white font. It's all rather blase. I tried adding a little color to my banner....but even that lacks pizazz. Simply put...I've always been and will always be the "plain" twin. S...always been about the hair, nails, makeup...the whole nine yards. Dressed to kill...even for a ten-minute trip to the market. Me? Chapstick (unflavored), levis and flipflops.

Sometimes...I think I should be taking queues from a few favorite reads. Crunching my creative. Cooking up tasty treats for the few & far between.

Should I go the erotic route and discuss my sex life? Teasing you with tales of things that go hum in the night? Setting up salatious stories about jaunts to my favorite E shop and the freaks that frequent the back room? Nah...I like to keep my kink in the closet. I mean really....who wants to hear about my inventory of size C batteries? Or...my weekly (failed) attempts to break the cute boy. Nobody likes a failure....and I'm certain that's a battle I don't want to win or report on should the unlikely event occur.

Perhaps a little potty humor for inspiration? Who doesn't appreciate potty humor? I suppose I could tell you about the dream I had the other night in which I took a massive dump. Huge. Felt ten pounds lighter. My brother-in-law would have been proud. In fact...I remember telling myself in the dream that I needed to take a picture to send to Ed. But....that's kinda gross....and to be honest...I don't want people analyzing my shit or the shedding of my detritus.

Photography? Eh....amateur at best. And...well...we've already covered closet kink. Oh...but hey....I accel at blurry shots of my fingers. I could post a collection of those...

Which...brings us to art. I was married to an artist. I'll just leave it at that.

Let's face it.... Not an ounce of creativity in these bones. I'm an accountant. Accountants are boring. Shit....I'm surprised we don't come with the following label. Warning...sleep inducing agent. Do not drive or operate heavy equipment in the company of an accountant. Seriously. Took me the longest time to figure out why the cute boy kept turning up the radio every time we got in the car. I thought he was trying to tune me out...but I don't talk much. Then it finally dawned on me....he's trying to stay awake. Poor thing.

I'm thinking of changing my name. Something a bit more representative of me....

Miss Mundane.

Stay tuned... I hear she's extraordinarily boring.