Tuesday, January 30, 2007


Woke up very early Saturday morning...couldn't get back to sleep. There was a charge in the air. Clear, sunny and cold. Pulled my shit together then went about rousting the v-man. He had a date with dad. I.....had a date with a beautiful woman. NOAA was calling for 7 @ 14... and sweet jesus... the easterlies were blowing.

My fare arrived early. We loaded up his boards and headed out the door. Could this actually be happening? Getting out the door...a half hour ahead of schedule? Crypes! ...pure bliss for a type A...such as myself.

I don't usually have company for the drive...but I welcomed the morning's conversation. Talk of surf...school...and as luck would have it....another barf-o-rama story that left me howling and thinking that the pickle needs a new nickname.

We pulled into town to find it big and a little disorganized. Not too enticing to me....but T was rarin to go so I unloaded him at the camp ground and told him I'd check in later.
Oh to be a 17-year-old surf rat. Cute...carefree...surf stoked.

Made a call...only to find that I was holding up the show. The boards & gear were waiting to be loaded. We...were heading south. Another hour in the car...but I didn't mind. I handed over the keys with the simple instruction of "no tickets".
Complete joke...for those that know my driving.

Arrived at the lighthouse....my oh my. Clean lines rolling in at head-n'a-half to double-overhead...and the swell was on the rise. Suited up and picked our way down the rocks for a dry hair paddle out. Not too crowded....about a dozen guys....but you could see more...steadily making their way out along the rip. The cold water felt good. Cleansing...after a very long week.

I sat on the shoulder for a bit...watching the big lefts roll through. Then slowly worked my way inside. I was definitely out of my comfort zone....but determined to get into one of these bombs. No such luck. Found it difficult to get my nose down the face and ended up getting blown off the peak at least 3 times.

Chatted up ding for a bit as I tried my hand at moving inside...but the clean up sets had me working hard to stay outside of the impact zone. I definitely got my paddle workout in for the day. After over two hours in the water...I was a popsicle. And wouldn't you know it.....a peak finally finds me. Dropped into it for a short ride before the whitewater engulfed me. Great...I was now inside. The only thing left to do was ride the white water the quarter mile in to the beach and catch the rip back out.

I made my way back out and sat on the far left...watching as the sets got bigger. Five lines to a set...and cleaning everyone out. At that point I decided I was too cold...and too tired to deal with that much white water. So I paddled over to the cliff and slowly picked my way out.

I won't get into my scramble up the cliff...but I can tell you I was beyond cold...tired...and involved several choice words as I stood and tried to figure out how to heave my board up the path without beating it to shit.

Sunday the swell had dropped a bit...but I was tired from a week's worth of workouts and Saturday's surf. So...we took the S.U.P out to Whalen. My first official spin on her. The herons watched as I worked on paddling into the current...keeping it in one place...then turning and paddling out into calm. The tide was going out so I was limited by shallowness as to where I could take her. I can't wait to get this baby out in the surf.

I see a monolith run in my future...

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photos courtesy of Gaz

Friday, January 26, 2007


Friday. Finally here. It's been a long....week. Filling out forms...printer paperjams...fending off phone calls. Wasted shoulders due to pull sets from hell and particularly hard yoga poses. And of course....Friday Traffic. My only thought....during the drive home...was how good that ibuprofen cocktail...closely followed with a cabernet chaser...was going to feel.

All of this was easily eclipsed by the following conversation.....

How was your day...buddy?

It was good. Emma threw up. I laughed. It was so cool...

That's my boy.

Friday, January 19, 2007


bring out

Thursday, January 18, 2007

sarcastic man

After a 2 hour delay to the start of my day.... I'm finally back at work. This was waiting for me... when I arrived.

Am I the only one that sees the irony in this...?
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Tuesday, January 16, 2007


Snow day today. Holiday yesterday. Another snow day tomorrow. How many movies can we watch? Who cares.....as long as at least one of them is Big Wednesday.

That's the lemon next to the pie...
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Monday, January 15, 2007

potty time

I like going pee. So do I...

One in a series of drawings of.... Sarcastic Man.

I have these kinds of conversations in public restrooms....all the time.
Don't you?

Got the v-man at work with me today. ...bet none of you get comic books created for you....by a six-year-old....while at work.

Maybe I'll fax this to the IRS....
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Sunday, January 14, 2007


This pic is from Thursday morning. Looks rather ominous. Snow. Dark. The monolith...bearing down upon her disciples. Deceiving. True to Oregon winter form....the sky took a turn. She opened up. Cleared for the weekend. The sun came out. The surf turned on.

Shoulda been here yesterday...

Well...of course.

I made the harrowing drive Friday night. Left the city at dark. Knew it was going to be slow going. Temps in the 20's. Packed ice. No all-wheel drive. No front-wheel drive. No chains. No worries. The usual hour & forty minute drive took me two & a half hours. Averaging 40 miles an hour. I kept hoping to find someone to follow over the pass. No such luck. I had the honour of drafting 6 vehicles from pdx to t'mook. Not one took advantage of the passing lanes. For some reason....they seemed to think german engineering would deliver them to the promised land. HA! My white knuckles were not appreciative...

Eh....wasn't that bad. Took advantage of the steptronic. Kept it in 3rd. Kept it under 45.

As 6 opened up into the 'mook....more packed ice... 17 degrees... and freezing fog. Fabulous...

Arrived 45 minutes later to a warm house....and even warmer hugs.

Saturday. So friggin cold...I thought for sure I was suffering from hypothermia....and all I'd done was get up to boil water for coffee. Fuck dawn patrol. Back to a warm bed. Ventured down to the beach at nine. What the hell??? Already 12 bodies in the water.....on one peak. One Peak!!! The only peak working....and two bigass vans from a local college had just pulled in and unloaded a shitload of soft-tops. By ten....almost 30 bodies in the water....and it hadn't even warmed up to 25.

When the surf's been so-so....and nobody's gettin any....not even ice and snow will keep us away. Stood and watched a multitude of drop-ins....on close-outs. Dared ding to paddle out....you know...clear the line-up. He was too pissed. Gaz was on the injured reserves list for the day....so no hike in to check my usual hex. No matter....probably wouldn't have been working anyway. Opted for the x...while waiting for an opening. No go.

No worries. I got water time this week. Got my ass kicked in the pool. Next time I try to use "burnout" as an excuse for missing a workout.....feel free to remind me. Close to 3 months out of the pool. Fuck.

Sunday. Gorgeous day. Cold. Clear. Sunny.

Gonna get water time....despite the crowds. Despite....the less than desirable close-outs. A little warmer today. Just as crowded. No worries. An easy paddle out. Timed just right.....dry hair. Not that that means anything. It was so friggin cold....all I had to do was blink....and "pop" ....out goes the right contact. Blind. Fuck it. Not gonna go in for new eyes. I can see out of one eye. Just means a lot of blinking and winking. I think the guy sitting next to me thought I was hitting on him.

Two hours in the water. Nothing "epic" to report. Water time....though. A really big AAAAAhhhhhhhhh.........

Was it worth the stress? Worth the shitty drive.....there & back?

Hell yes.

photo courtesy of Gaz
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Thursday, January 11, 2007


This morning's shot of the cape. I hear the surf was cold and clean....

photo courtesy of Gaz. Posted by Picasa

Sunday, January 07, 2007


Haven't been in the water....in a month. Already....taking its toll. Ugliness...at its finest. Soft around the edges. Softer....around the middle. Disconnected. Distracted. Bitchy. Hours spent day dreaming at the desk. Constant monitoring of NOAA. Looking. Hoping. Seeking out.... something. Anything. An opening? Yes...I'm well aware that that 4 hour window of opportunity....winked...smiled...then slammed shut. Me at my desk. Everyone else....rubbing it in. This is winter. The swell....huge. The wind...daunting. Intervals....idiotic. What can I say? Welcome to Oregon.

Will this be the winter of my discontent?

Not likely. But....it was fun using that line.

Luckily.....I have the luxury of surfing vicariously through others. Surf reports. Non-reports. Sessions. Stories. Stoke. A tilted smile. An inflected word. Big waves. No waves. Glass. A virus.... warming me with fever. Infected to the core.

Be it me....or someone else.

When the goods are got...

I smile.

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Wednesday, January 03, 2007

car talk

NPR couldn't come up with this kind of creativity. Some conversations.......shouldn't be repeated.

...I'm a rocket ship on my way to Mars
On a collision course
I am a satellite I'm out of control
I am a sex machine ready to reload
Like an atom bomb about to
Oh oh oh oh oh explode...

v-man: What's a sex machine? Is that like a machine gun?

me (stifling laughter): No....not like a machine gun.

v-man: A human gun?

me (trying not to blow coffee out my nose): Um..........yeah. That sounds about right. A kind of human gun.

v-man: Can a sex machine hurt you?

me (visualizing really bad anime porn): Um.....yes....I suppose it can hurt.

v-man: Have you ever been hurt by a sex machine?

me (trying to keep my car on the road): No......not yet.

This was our morning commute discussion.....several days ago. The v-man requested Queen...he likes to sing along with Freddy. Oh how I wish I carried a pocket recorder. Future blackmail piece.......wasted on the likes of me. .....some conversations.......shouldn't be repeated. This one though.....

A keeper.